This year has been great. But it has also been trying. One night recently it all sort of caught up with me really late. Slightly hoping my mom would still be up I shot her a text. Instead I heard my door open. In came papa bear holding some clothes and hearing my sniffles. Trying to be a good dad he sits on my bed to talk to me. Unintentionally he sat directly on my leg making me shoot it out from underneath him. He then came and laid down next to me just as he did not 10 years ago when he would read me my nightly bed time story. Even though our conversation was heavy and full of tears on my behalf, I couldn’t help but reflect back to that time of innocence for me. Reading my favorite book called “A Silly Day.” I’ve never felt more safe than I did in that moment. Even though I’m 17 I think it’s safe to say that most of us just want to wrap our arms around our daddy’s and have him tells us that everything’s going to be alright. Because for that second, minute, hour, day, or even life time, you can’t help but believe him. I realized in this moment I’m growing up. The frustrations, doubts, and worries I’m having are normal. Things like college and careers seem to be the headlining topic of conversation this year. But it continually in stills in me that this time next year when I’m freaking out my daddy won’t be there to climb in bed with me, hold me, and tell me everything is going to be alright. That when I don’t feel good my moms not going to be there to wait on me hand and foot. That my nana isn’t going to call me with computer help and then feed me a big supper afterwards. Life is about to change big time and I’m scared out of my wits. Yes I’m so excited for change and new beginnings but there are more last coming up very fast. So I ask that you keep not only me in your prayers but the entire senior class because I know that I’m not alone in this feeling. As my dad was leaving my room he picked up my quilt off my floor and handed it to me. This quilt is the same one that was on my crib so it brings me a sense of comfort. Then I went in search of my lamb named Lamby who I have had as long as I can remember. You best believe that these two things will be coming with me next year. We’ve been through a lot and there’s more to come. I look forward to what the rest of this year brings. Hopefully less worry and more smiles but I think some worry is healthy. I am grateful for every moment that has lead me to where I am right now. I genuinely believe that I am finding myself again. I was lost for a bit but I think slowly but surely I’m coming into my own again. As always, thanks for reading!!!
XOXO, Emma Rose